Thursday, September 24, 2009

And the winner is....

I've just got to rant about a phenomenon that is really driving me crazy lately.

It's with moms and it's about being competitive. About EVERYTHING. Heading the parent committee for Einstein's Gate program is a lot of work. Part of my job is attending school events and spreading the word about our meetings so I can get more parents involved. This means I run into a lot of parent's I already know.

When I see people we know we exchange pleasantries, "hi, how are you?" Etc. And then it turns into this. "Well, it was hard for me to come here tonight and tomorrow I have to go to Joey's school for PTA and then back to Jack's school for PTA meeting and then I have to find the cure for cancer and then after that I'm going to solve world hunger." You, get the idea, it goes on and on.

I'm busy. I'm busier then most people I know. I talk about it here, or FB, or twitter, but I don't bore people that I barely know with all the gory details.

Last night another parent, from Beav's school, took it to another level. I had received a call from the room mother because I haven't paid the deposit for his field trip yet. It's $2200 and I think that's a LOT of money to send a 14-year-old to DC. And because less kids are in his class the price might go up but once I pay the deposit, I'm stuck. So, I'm talking to this room mother and I'm explaining that it's a lot of money. I'm not saying I can't afford it, I just think it's a lot of money. So, this parent starts telling me how she understands and then I hear about how she is a single mother and how much money she makes a month and how she doesn't get child support and all I can think is 'why is this woman sharing all her personal crap with me?'

But then she kinda crosses the line and says that I need to have faith in God, that God will help provide money for the field trip. And that just pissed me off. Number 1, you can't assume that just because I send my child to a Christian school I share the same beliefs as you do. However, I've been through a lot of hell in the last year. My faith is about gone. That is my issue, and I'll work that out on my own.

So, I stopped her. And I said, "please don't preach about faith to me, I've been through a lot of hell this year and I don't have a lot of faith left." So now it becomes a contest to see whose life is hardest, only I refuse to play. Of course that doesn't stop her from telling me why her life has been so hard. It's really none of my business and really I don't care. And I don't want to compete with you about who has it harder because truly it's all subjective.

My personal hell could be completely different than your personal hell. What is horrible for me, might not be horrible for you and vice versa. I just don't think it should be a contest. I don't think that you need to hear all my personal business, which is why I didn't share any of it.

By the time we ended the conversation I could tell you oodles about her life, she really couldn't tell you anything about mine.

It's just frustrating, this whole competitive streak. Do we really have to tell everyone how hard our life is to prove something? I don't get it.

This is where I scream out loud in frustration.

1 comment:

Jennifer said...

$2200 is a lot of money for a trip. Heck you could take your whole family on a week-long cruise for that. Do that instead :)

I hate one-uppers. Reminds me of Penelope from SNL. You should just start making up crazy outlandish things to beat them at their own game. "Oh your ex doesn't pay child support and you've got the clap? Well my ex makes me pay for his new girlfriend's breast implants and he gave me HIV. And Herpes. And swine flu."